I usually say something like "oh I'm sorry to hear that"

I do, but secretly I feel badly for how sleep deprived and tired they’ll soon be. 😩

Usually if they're close friends or family.

Yes. Pre baby, with gusto. After baby, just to be polite. Those mofos don’t know what they’re getting into, and I’m not going to be the one to break it to them that their old lives … are .. ovah suckaaaaaa

At most, I'll comment 'Congratulations!' when they announce it on Facebook.

Sure, just spare me the 38 pictures of it spitting up, because then I'm checking out

Of course.

No, nobody should be having babies..

Yes. I can even feign interest for short periods too. Just don’t ask me if I want to hold it.

I do wish them luck. The congratulations would be due when said children stand on their own feet, but by then nobody cares.

Yes, its common courtesy

Yes

Only if I knew that's what they wanted