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Anonymous User · 11mo

sry this is a rant n u r one of my fav ppl on this app n knowing tht u r nsfw focus so i’m sure that u won’t reply.
i had a horrible day. i participated it in a public speaking online event and i won by vote.i really put my effort into it and i think that i did well too cuz this was not my first time winning this kind of competition but some people started saying “ofcuz she’d won people only vote for pretty people” right in front of my face. is it wrong that i feel offended?

Question cont/
idk i just couldn’t hide my disappointment n turnt off my camera n stayed mostly silent for the rest of the event.i really feel insecure abt my own skill now n it’s a small community so ppl r gonna pick up every small mistake n exaggerate it. even if i win smth again, they r gonna think it’s cuz of the face.
is tht how hj feels when ppl disrespect him as a dancer too n ppl only praise his dance cuz of his face (lol i’m reaching so far)despite his impressive footwork i feel like crying tbh

Omg anon i didn't see this until now but i'm so sorry that you had a shitty experience like that! Having your skills be dismissed for any reason is akways really rough regardless of the reason for it :( i think the thing with any oppressive societal construct (be it gender, ethnicity or even beauty standards) is that it ultimately hurts the people who fit into the favored group too because it ultimately also places them into a box of expectations and assumptions, even if it does give them more power and wiggle room. I think the best thing we all can do to combat that is to not give those assumptions power over us and fight against putting them on anyone, ourselves included. Of course, fitting into beauty standards can give someone an advantage, but trying to push down those who have it instead of lifting up those who don't ultimately doesn't help fight the idea itself and prevents those who let themselves get pushed down from fighting that idea too. I don't know i got a little lost in the theory there but i really hope that you'll get your confidence back and won't let their words discourage you, because showing and improving your skills clearly brings you joy and can bring joy to other people too and maybe give you the opportunity to push the community towards a culture where being considered pretty isn't relevant to the skill shown and anyone who thinks so will get proven wrong. But maybe im just naive also i think youre right about the hyunjin thing fdjdksjshs

Tl;dr im sorry that happened and fuck the haters being confident in your skills and yourself will ultimately do more to fight the beauty standards than their comments and assumptions ever will

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