urrrrgghg just... the course is going well I think but I've been struggling to integrate socially coz everyone else is much younger/wants to party ALL the time/all seem to be very "normal"/neurotypical (the gender thing is a WHOLE difference kettle of fish, god). So everyone has little cliques/groups and I don't really belong anywhere. Like, don't get me wrong I'm happy spending a lot of time in my room chilling and having solo time, but yesterday one of the girls was really terse with me when I tried to make friendly conversation so it just really shut down my confidence and made me feel like all my efforts are pointless, y'know? I know it's likely nothing to do with me and she was probably just having a stressful moment but I was trying to reach out (which is really hard for me to do irl) and it got thrown back in my face, so it sent me into an anxiety spiral for the rest of the night... 🙃 OH WELL I get the joy of mock exams today
sdfjdgh sorry for the big ramble, it's still rattling around in my brain and I hate it. Thank you so much for reaching out though, it means more than you know 🥺💖