I did it for justice or what I saw as justice. And yeah I often have regrets and am judged by many. Problem is I would have fought to the death. And cos that didn't happen I was left with a lot of damage. It was to do with my home being taken, facing disability and poverty, a corrupt banking system pushing me to the edge , an ex who betrayed me, a health care system that injured and failed me. It was a lot of wars rolled onto one. Worth it? Probably not. Trauma has its own logic.