salutations.

i've returned once more. retrospring is shutting down next year apparently.... if anyone knows where most of us are planning to migrate to, please let me know. i'm unable to use twitter for this sort of thing..... seeing as though i would very much like to keep this side of me hidden for all of eternity. i even alter my typing style whilst talking here.... anyhow, i do hope i manage to find someplace else. it's quite nice to finally be able to have a place to share my thoughts. if i may allow myself to get mildly emotional for a moment; these thoughts and attractions i have are almost all a result of hypersexuality and intrusive thoughts. it's nice to have an outlet where i know i won't be judged. thank you to those that talk to me regularly on here, it's appreciated in ways you'll never know. pardon my sentimentality.

-I

salutations.

i've returned... i've been busy, and to be quite honest with you all... i forgot this website existed. but alas, i am here now. as for my words of wisdom....

spy being bullied and degraded by any merc in front of the others. scout (hi foolsie~), sniper (haha, my favorite...), demo, medic, heavy, soldier (who i think has great potential in this regard), etc. anyone. essentially, spy not only getting degraded, but everyone watching it happen... watching the back of his mask get grabbed, and his head shaken around... watching him get shouted at for being "useless" or "stupid".

though with sniper, i think he'd be quiet. growling in his ear, everyone else can still hear it, but he's more..... his energy is focused.

spy gets hard. bonus points if no one can tell because his cock is so small.... haha.

-I

salutations.

sniper pissed off, bashing someone's head in against the floor over and over and over, their skull caving in and brains getting everywhere, blood covering sniper, and he's panting and growling like an animal.

he's usually detached from negative emotions, not really knowing how to process them. so he bottles them up. yet, this means they all explode out once he's had enough. it's animalistic, gruesome, violent. it's like watching rabid beast.

head against the floor of his nest, wood splintering and getting in the victim's wounds. a violent and horrific death.

-I

salutations.

it's time... for some lolicon engie headcanons. pedo engie...? they essentially mean the same thing, i suppose. anyway... engie gives the impression of a respectable family man, and i theorize he always has. so... he would be asked to babysit a lot. he feels incredibly guilty and shameful of his attraction, so at first he only "accidentally" lifted their skirt or shirt up, or "accidentally" rubbed their little cunts during bath time. but eventually he started to do it with more purpose. tugging a girl's panties down while they were playing, saying they were playing doctor. gave them a "check-up", which was just touching them all over.... spread her legs and hummed, saying that he needed to make sure everything down there was in working order. touching their little clits, spreading their lips... maybe eating them out ...

other times, making a little girl touch his cock. he said it was a special game that only they could know about.... she was too young too understand the significance of what she was doing. he touched girls more and more, and started to take pictures and videos of them... i imagine he has quite the collection on a flash drive. sneaking pictures up the skirts of little girls. even bringing it to the water park one time.

i have more thoughts but i must go now.

-I

salutations.

im not much of a scout person, i don't find myself particularly attracted to him often. but i do have one or two ideas for him... like him being so desperate for sex that he roofies women at the bar, raping them in a bathroom stall. he's so /pathetic/ too, whimpering and whining and moaning miss pauling's name. he doesn't want to rape her, so he'll settle for random women.

and... haha. im a supporter of t4t scoutpauling. scout finding men to roofie so that he can ride them, feel their cocks in his cunt and imagine it's pauling. he hates how the men aren't soft like her, don't have her breasts or pretty hair and nice moans. but he'll settle..... for now.

-I

salutations.

i am apparently having too many ideas tonight, hm? in any case... sniper as a teen most definitely had notebooks full of drawings of him raping people and getting raped, including animals and his parents. he still draws in notebooks to this day. has them hidden under his mattress. drawings of him raping a pretty woman or man. raping the sheep, or a barn cat, or a dog. drawings of him sucking his father's cock. groping his mum's breasts and fat. sandwiched between them...

i think snipers sexual attraction is based on a foundation of vastly uneven power dynamics. taking the autonomy of another person or creature, or having his autonomy taken from him. it's a desire grounded in feral behavior.

-I

salutations.

i cannot get the image out of my head of sniper as a teenager, jerking off in the back of the class under his desk. i imagine that he has a very high libido, and it was even worse when he was going through puberty. couldn't help looking at the attractive people in his class, thinking about bending them over the desk abd raping them right there. or even them raping him.... they're so much bigger than him after all. perhaps him thinking about getting raped right in the front of the class, perhaps by the teacher. working his cock under the desk, trying to not get caught.... which he most definitely gets noticed, grunting and groaning, cum hitting the underside of his desk and splattering onto the floor. his parents constantly getting told by the school that sniper is very.... /energetic/ in class.

ah... his parents talking to him about it. and it's just so embarrassing... the ask him what is making him so aroused during class, and he has to awkwardly scratch the back of his neck and look away...

-I

salutations.

in regards to my last one... sniper fucking sheep. perhaps started when he was a teenager, desperate and constantly horny. he's essentially shunned by all his peers for being weak, so it's not like he'll be able to find a willing partner. perhaps he was in the barn one day, jerking off. i imagine he would go there sometimes for privacy. so that he may moan as loud as he likes.

jerking off, working his dick and moaning. and perhaps he looks up.... and sees the sheep's rear end. sees it's cunt.... and he's so desperate. he's so horny. he's not thinking correctly. he reaches out, stroking its cunt. Standing over it, pushing his cock into it. the sheep bleating, trying to get away but sniper holds onto it. he's had a taste and isn't willing to let go. grabs the sheep's wool, fucking it roughly and desperately. imagines his parents walking in on him doing it, but that just makes him moan louder, panting.

and sniper doing that more and more throughout his life. he started fucking sheep during a formative time in his life, essentially he ruined his sexuality. always fucks a few when he goes to visit his parents farm. and when he sees other sheep, perhaps at petting zoos and other farms, he fucks those too. he's gotten caught a few times. someone walking in on him ballsdeep in a sheep, and he just moans loudly, cumming while the person watches. someone coming up and pulling him away from the sheep, and he cums as he's pulled out, cum shooting all over the sheep and ground. gets called a disgusting pervert, but that just makes him pant, red face.

he can't see sheep without getting a boner. out with the team somewhere, and there's sheep... and goodness, he's trying so hard to will his boner away. getting caught by a team member while fucking one. tries to stop but the person tells him to continue.

-I

salutations.

spy getting raped is so perfect to me. he's the most prim and proper, therefore he is the one that can be the most defiled. i think about him being tied up in humiliating poses, cunt or small cock on display, unable to do anything to cover himself, gagged. imagine him tied up and left like that, for other people to find.... engineer shoving his wrench in spys cunt, putting cigarettes out on his thighs, says that he's not so high and mighty now. soldier smacking his cunt and calling him a woman, says there is no place for girls on the battlefield, says they are much better for being raped, and fucks him. demoman eating spy out, licking all of soldier's cum out of him. medic fingering him, fucking him and rubbing his clit, says that he's been waiting for this chance, that every checkup he gave spy just pushed him further towards strapping him to the table and raping him. pyro laughing and touching spy's quivering cunt, perhaps rubbing a balloonicorn plushie against him, soft fabric dampening with the slick and cum. scout finding him.... finding his own father tied up, cunt slimy and drooling cum, mask stained with tears, gag damp in his mouth... gets excited, says he didn't even know spy had a cunt, gropes his chest and is disappointed to see that he's had top surgery, pulls his cock out and rubs it against spys cunt, spy sobbing and shaking his head, scout fucking him hard and fast, not caring about spy's pleasure at all. "how's it feel, pops? you like getting raped by your own son? cuz i sure like it!" and sniper.... ahh, shoving his cock against the balled up fabric gag in spys mouth, and pisses into it so that the fabric soaks it up, spy having a piss soaked gag in his mouth now..... sniper then pinches and pulls at spy's tdick, laughing as he squirms. fucks him like an animal, scratching and growling at him the whole time. spy's been cumming each and every time with each person, sobbing as he does so. and now... heavy. goodness. working his ginormous cock over spy, jamming it in him with no prep. spy screaming through the gag, voice breaking. his cervix getting penetrated, heavy fucking his womb directly. gets the cum shot directly into his womb too, it fills him up so much it hurts.

and spy....? he loves it. he goes to sex clubs and truck stops and shady alleyways, just chasing that feeling of getting raped like a cheap whore. he's obsessed...

-I

salutations.

sniper having sex with spy. Holds him down and is very into it. sniper kneeling over spy, unbuckling his belt. and he says without thinking "im gonna rape the bloody hell out of you, spook" in the most menacing voice ever. and spy simply staring in shock, dumbfounded. sniper realizes what he said, and is also in a state of shock. just staring at each other. "spy i-" can't even finish the sentence. what do you even say in a situation like this? "sorry i said i was gonna rape you"? no no, there's really no way to explain yourself.

spy speaking, smirk on his face once the shock wears off, "well...? aren't you going to /rape/ me, bushman? are you not going to dirty me with those hands of yours? hold me down and /defile/ me?"

sniper's eyes going blown out. panting like an animal, grabbing spy and flipping him over, pinning his head to the floor. it's over for spy.

-I