Im sorry to hear that D:
if it helps at all - you dont have to work further than sketching if you dont want to <:3
theres a lot of expectation of creating finished rendered fully illustrated pieces for some, but sometimes just doing nothing but sketches for a while can help make you feel more in control and more confident perhaps :3 the expectation of making fully colored and shaded pieces has really put me in a down before when loose sketches and expressive work that isnt cleaned up is smth i enjoy doing and looking at much more!

thats why id definitely recommend the sketchbook - dont try to have it look prestine like some sketchbook tour but really allow yourself to have a book that is MESSY like the ugliest spreads youve ever seen - you dont have to show them to anyone but allow yourself that freedom to experiment and maybe even draw the exact same sketch 5 times if thats smth you like sketching! also doing silly doodles can sometimes help loosen you up
of course pro tip is getting obsessed with SOMETHING it doesnt matter what it is, but anything you enjoy drawing, whether is a character you like, or an object that just feels fun to draw to you - anything that brings you joy and makes you look forward to either the process, the fun of drawing, or the finished sketch :3

I hope this helps at all <3 fingers crossed for you!