Hello, sender. Allow me to reply to your confession and also take this chance to share everything at once (not bcs your fault, I just want to convey something through your message. Besides, I'm really thankful that you showed up at the perfect time).

Honestly, I logged out because I’ve been out on the streets for the past two days. I’ve barely slept, almost not at all–my whole body aches, and I’ve got a few scratches on my forehead and ring finger. But I’m glad I could at least contribute a little as a uni student (sorry for the TMI, I know this is outside the RPS context, so I’ll end the TMI there). Anyway, I just got to stretch out my legs today and finally crash on my soft bed in this quiet house of mine, since I live alone. For some reason, as soon as I got home after updating my condi to friends and family through messages, my mind went straight to Retro, so I opened it up in a flash.

And look at the menfess that just popped up? I read it like three times/?kinda over the top, but I’ve never actually gotten an apology directly from someone who’s done stuff to my RPS before. Usually, if I’m not the one apologizing first, even when I wasn’t the one at fault (though I have been wrong, no one’s perfect), I only get an apology when I call out or reach out to that person first.

This is the small thing I’ve always wanted. An apology from people who weren’t directly involved or didn’t have issues with me but judged me anyway just because they were following the crowd, defending a friend, or didn’t like some small thing I did (nothing harmful). I’m kinda shook, feeling a bit stiff but also super relieved and happy. I really appreciate the sender, you turned my tough exhausting day. Especially with how drained I am from my own country’s democracy into something that seriously helped my physical and mental state.

Whoever you are, sender, thank you so much, really. I truly appreciate you, and thanks for being brave enough to show up and apologize. So, I’ll also apologize sincerely to the sender if my actions were a bit much (I used to be harsh and easily triggered). I regret that, and as I’ve grown, I’ve realized I was a bit annoying back then, especially with how often I used harsh words. In my early days of being part of RPS, I didn’t have anyone guiding me. RPS and ENHA FA were my first real experiences (before that, I had a small, private account in another fandom, just quietly fanboying), so when my account grew, I lost my way and got too caught up. Maybe, it was star syndrome? But a huge thank you to the sender for being brave enough to come forward. Thanks for making my day. The menfess was short, but I’ll remember it in my writing journey, knowing that some people finally realize there’s no point in hating each other in the RPS world over petty reasons (big cases are different, that’s up to each person, and it’s normal in the virtual world for things to end in blocking, but what shouldn’t be normalized is bullying someone just because your friend got into it when, in fact, your friend was the one who started it).

Believe me, I’ve often been made into someone’s WhatsApp story by people I don’t even know, so when someone reports it to me with a screenshot, I’m always confused about how to react because I don’t know them and have no idea who they are. The worst was with two people I’ve never met or interacted with, who still had the nerve to type my name along with animal names and other nasty stuff. Remember, I don’t know them, and I’ve never done anything like that to them because I’m super careful about my real-life privacy, especially my WhatsApp number, since in real life, I’m kind of known. That’s what I protect, so I’ve never bullied someone or made them the subject of gossip in a story just to passively show off to viewers that we’re powerful and can trample on someone’s reputation, rights, and privacy.

Thank you, have a nice day 👋🏻🖤