anon ♡ · 3mo
A little angst. Yjh being afraid of telling kdj about their future child. Not bc yjh thinks he would be mad about it, if not he would be afraid of being like his own father. It's comprehensible knowing dokja's childhood, but yjh can't imagine kdj being like /that thing/- hell, no one who knows kdj would think that.
And what if he's so afraid of being a parent and decides to leave them bc it's the best for them?
...What if he asks him to abort?
He knows he wouldn't, but kdj isn't the only one afraid.
it took me…a WHILE to get to this one because i was in a very different parenting AU state of mind 😭 but the more i think about how to fill this one, the more i can’t bring myself to do it
it’s funny! i was telling a friend that this AU style you’re describing is usually soooooo so my jam. but if anything i feel like kdj is the type to be flighty in this sort of high-stakes emotional vulnerability scenario :(
i think that in order for yjh to even CONSIDER having a kid with kdj he would realistically have to beat him over the head with I LOVE YOU AND TRUST YOU IDIOT for a long time before it even became a realistic consideration
HOWEVER…for the sake of hc…let’s say it happens! i think it would be one of those moments where they both get very tense and very silent. they both think they are the type of people who “don’t need to exchange words to understand each other” and a to a huge degree that’s true! but they are also the type that NEED to communicate verbally to clear up their unspoken misunderstandings or else
i think yjh would rather argue it out than let it sit in silence. i think he would call kdj a coward—and he would be right about that. it would make kdj sick that he did this to someone else and his trauma loop and even though yjh wants this with, nobody else, it would be an ugly situation in the early months
he would come to resent kdj for not seeking him out, even though he knows kdj loves him, and he knows kdj is doing it because he wants to avoid something that could inherently be in his own nature
and kdj eventually finding the stones when yjh is already like very visibly pregnant. maybe even close to the end of his term. to be like. i’m sorry. i’m going to keep fucking up like this. is it too late to fix things?
yjh being like i’m not giving them up for adoption. it’s my body and my choice and i wanted them here and kdj nods somberly. he didn’t want yjh to abort or give them up in the first place. it’s just going to always be a situation, and something they have to grow together in
and kdj IS an amazing dad once the baby is born. maybe he’s not perfect maybe he’s not conventional but his determination to be better for their child than his father ever was to him gentles him, makes him skittish at times, but yjh is there to keep him on track.
thanks for the request i’ve been crying about it for weeks xoxo
