Arman · 15 answers · 3y

Tell me about cheek kissing etiquette in your culture!

Cheek kissing usually in Belgium and France is not more than a habit between people who are basically friends, relatives, neighbours or acquaintences. All genders do it but among women the way we do it tells a bit more about how well we like each other and among men it is a less friendly habit but a bit more formal.
Germans do not kiss on cheeks when they do not express affection, closer friendship or a loved relative. When we express love and mutual affection we kiss on the mouth. Also close friends kiss on the mouth, it is more rare between men and women but fairly common between women. men do not kiss on the lips as a sign of close friendship, they are usually too homophobic for this. But certainly gay men do it nevertheless. In some areas gay women kiss all the time when they see each other. They kiss on the cheek and quite often also on the mouth, it is not a sign of big affection or of an intimate relationship, it is just a sign for belonging to that group of gay women. Also kissing in general in public has developed more to a lose habit of saying 'hello to each other. I also do live in Dutch areas here and Flemish ones and they do not kiss at all but between girls who are friends. In Belgium and France you might get the cheeks kissed when you are introduced to a family or friends during an encounter and they expect to be kissed back on their cheeks. As a new person the lips shall not really meet the cheeks, it is more like placing the kiss into the air on the side of the cheeks of the other person. When you befriend after a while the kissing into the air might get replaced with really touching lips with cheeks. Women are more open to real cheek kissing usually unless they are of superior social rank. They tend to stay more formal even in their cheek kissing. As a man you must not kiss the cheeks of any woman or man full lips on cheeks at the first encounter. We girls are allowed to do so when we feel like it but in no case does this mean anything else but a bit of friendliness. Nobody will take the cheek kissing as an invitation for undue touching, further kissing or flirting or such. Cheek kissing in general is a gradual way of saying 'hello' from very formal to very intimate. My girlfriend and I met each other at a formal event and it was in Belgium and being introduced to her and the man on her side required mutual cheek kissing just shy of really touching their skin. Three times. They kiss three times, left, right, left. Since she instantly felt she liked me her cheek kissing didn't stop a centimeter off my cheeks but her lips gently met with my cheeks. When we parted she not only fully kissed my cheeks she also hugged me, while the friend on her side just went so far as to close air kiss my cheeks and took both of my hands. Then he gave my hands into hers and not only did she squeeze my hands she also placed a kiss on my mouth. That was a surprise but I returned that kiss two seconds later. It was by no means indecent or unusual. Women can do this when they feel like it and it is a sign of liking. It has no erotic or sexual connotation. It also doesn't mean anything beyond 'I like you'. Her mother was also present and I got introduced to her. Since she is a distinguished women I had to kiss three times into the air. But she felt quickly she liked me and after the formal three cheek kissing she added a generous real cheek kissing from her side on top. If I would not have wanted or allowed that I could have moved my head a few millimters away and she wouldn't have tried. As we now know each other since many years our greeting kisses are full cheek kisses while hugging firmly plus she always also kisses me on my lips. She does it the same way with her daughter. So kissing-wise, I am having a daughter state with her. This is fucking complicated since I was grown up in Germany where we have no such kissing culture. Only parents kiss their children on their cheeks and good friends sometimes do it too, mostly among girls. Culture is so adventurous.

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