Well I'm certainly not desperate enough to give you a name. Knowing you, that's just about asking to be harassed. You can already tell which one of the inboxes are me, so I don't see the point if you're not planning to.
I can't get an exact source for you. There's not a lot of research on this topic, even less concrete statistics, and opinions are generally mixed and/or based on personal account. I can only go off of the information that I already know or have been presented. And as far as I'm concerned, if you're displaying warning signs that I've seen, heard, and personally experienced, then that's a telltale sign something's wrong. Especially considering how young you are.
You're still missing the point with the toddlercon. "I just made Ciel smaller and realized it doesn't matter." The fact that it no longer matters to you IS the problem. I don't need to repeat myself on why, and I'm sure you don't want to hear it again either. Fiction can influence reality. Not to the extent that some might claim, but it still does; especially when you already have concerning behavior. Fictional images associate themselves with real behaviors and feelings. We interpret drawings as concepts we already know. With that, the more you engage in a subject associated with pleasure, the further you tend to go in search of that pleasure. Do you see where I'm going with this? By engaging in lolicon, you're connecting the image of children to the concept of arousal. Oftentimes that ends in attempts to replicate that pleasure in real life. And before you jump to conclusions, no, that is not me saying that's how it goes 100% of the time. What I AM saying is that it's a very real possibility. One that's much better to acknowledge than to ignore. Seriously, get better coping mechanisms. Obviously that's much harder than that one sentence implies, but you get the point. If not, I'd highly suggest you at least stop making weird comments about children around minors. That shit's revolting.

By the way, mutual empathy makes life a whole lot less miserable. Not dwelling on that because it's not the point, but I thought I should mention it. I don't expect you to feel everybody's pain after you've been hurt, but some basic human decency would go a long way.