There are a few things that come to mind here, and I’ll say that the biggest thing is that a good poly fic doesn’t have to be 100% realistic (no fic is!) but I think that poly fics are richer when the writer really tries to put themselves in their characters’ shoes and think about how they, in the context of the situation and their character, would react to certain situations. I think a lot of people tend to think of polyamory as unnatural or maybe even more simple than it is, and the truth is that’s both very different from monogamy and also very similar. There are a lot of types of polyamory; with fic people tend to think of triads or relationships where everyone is dating each other, and while this is a type of polyamory, it’s only one type! Personally all of my relationships have been Vees/relationships in which the people I was dating had their own partners or I was dating multiple people separate from each other, and this has often been the case with the poly relationships my friends have been in.

Going off that, I would say that you shouldn’t be afraid to show these different kinds of relationships. Polyamory can be messy; to me, it’s messy even when it’s going the way it should. I don’t mean messy in a negative way—just that when there are multiple people with different personalities and opinions and experiences and desires, connected in these ways, there’s a lot going on at once, and these dynamics can be complicated! Don’t be afraid to let it get messy; polyamory isn’t perfect, and it can also be difficult in the sense that it really can be hard to navigate. These relationships have the same struggles as monogamous relationships and their own unique struggles too—and people aren’t always ready to handle them. Polyamory is common in fic spaces, but I feel like sometimes people don’t entirely consider what it’s like to actually live these experiences—even in queer spaces, polyamory is often looked down upon.

If you’re trying to write polyamory true to life, I must of course say to do your research and look into the advice and stories shared by real polyamorous people. There’s plenty out there! Don’t be afraid to ask questions and always keep learning. Polyamory itself doesn’t have to be the Main Topic of fics with polyamorous relationships. It shouldn’t always be! Writers often use polyamory to explore different types of attraction and relationships which is just fine—and we should also consider how to portray these relationships with nuance and depth!