anon · 2mo
yeah, that's all very true. if we wanna look into this further, i think it's specifically that kind of early-ish struggling with mental health issues (or early stages of recovery) mindset of being stuck believing you'll never get better and that makes you inherently unlovable and seeing everyone else around you get better while you still believe you can't just makes it worse. and i guess this is kind of what eichi is currently dealing with if we look at lines like 'you've all become so very human, you're always leaving me behind' and 'i think i'm beyond the point of saving' but it might also be (part of) what makes (some) people not want to see eichi genuinely grow away from that mindset. to keep the relatability.
and wataru wanting to see eichi's mental health improve is a good thing – but sometimes, when you're stuck in a particularly bad mindset, people wanting you (or the character you project onto) to get better doesn't always Feel like a good thing, at least not initially, it might feel more like rejection or 'betrayal' like you said. so yeah... that was a really long-winded way of saying i agree lmao. and no offense to anyone who may be reading this either. like i get it.
to be honest, i'm just another one of many people who relate to and project onto eichi a lot. specifically for very similar chronic illness experiences. and for me that's precisely why i do want to see eichi grow and their mental health to improve!!
and yeah! i think wataru realizing that the reassurance they can offer isn't enough is really good actually. this was also an issue eichi needed to resolve with tori specifically. and that matters. i'm hoping for more developments between them & that this won't just be brushed off in future stories.
their communication struggles are very dear to me too for the same reason. and i love that eichi's issues and problems don't get 'magically fixed' or just disappear. i think a lot of eichi's mental health issues and insecurities are connected to/a result of their disability and the experience of growing up never knowing how much time they have left (AND not having a proper support system through such a difficult time of their life. of course keito was there, but keito was just a child too. and eichi never speaks fondly of (most of) their family and i think there's a reason for that. i have many thoughts about the tenshouin family but that's a different topic entirely fjskhsj). like obviously that's something that's going to affect one's mental health. and the issues and mindsets they've developed because of that won't just disappear once eichi's physical health improves. it matters that that's true. it matters a lot.
i was super excited about the rare wataru thought bubble too!! it's so so nice to see their thoughts for once. i'd love to see more fine or eichi content from wataru's perspective, i think it could lead to some really good developments too...
YEAAAH and i do think that exact early stage is something that like. also just kind of gets really rough with eichi's specific issues due to being chronically ill. hes very familiar with the feeling of being "left behind" by his peers, especially when it comes to stuff like recovery and due to being chronically ill has had to kind of learn how to cope with the fact that that is just life for him. if he does so well is another question entirely, but that's like i assume the direction most of his coping skills go: "this isn't something about myself that i can change, so i have to compensate with something else instead"
and yeah like i understand where the reading comes from it's just. again. it's frustrating and i find the way that wataei shippers especially tend to get into doom spirals about enstars writing to be deeply frustrating. its part of why im not really actively engaging with anyone (beyond like. yknow. my boyfriend) whose main ship is wataei because. its exhausting!!!
and idt projecting onto eichi is like a bad thing at all, like its fine, ive done it too with some of the writing, i think recognizing an aspect of yourself in fictional stories is extremely normal its just also something a lot of people dont take beyond that/dont really recognize they are doing? and that ends with people taking stuff personally in the way you described.
i honestly actually really hope that this WAS like leading up to something thats going to get addressed in a future fine story and/or like potentially a mini arc for wataei or even just wataru to like. iterate further on their relationship and let them grow as people. for better and for worse :p
and in that context i dont even mind interpersonal drama between wataei because literally conflict is something thats kind of been baked into their dynamic, but another thing thats also kind of baked into it is that they resolve their conflict in the end. idk both eplink and sanctuary had what i would consider "conflict" for wataei. high hopes perhaps but i would love to get to see a story where eichi DOES get to demonstrate growth and trust in wataru in a similar situation, that hes learning to let them do their own thing without freaking out about it etc. i think vs audience started to hint at that already but. yeah.
