Nikolai sees a rat next to a pigeon on street, takes a pic and sends it to Fyodor with caption "us 💕🕊🐀" - sappy as hell. He ties someone to dozen balloons, makes them float in the air and informs Fyodor of his mischief. He sees a coat he thinks Fyodor would love and text him "look what I snatched for you ;3" along with a pic of the stolen coat.

Texts never stop. Fyodor hardly ever responds but that doesn't deter Nikolai anyhow. One sided convo goes on for a while before Fyodor blocks his number to tease back. Fyolai's messed up flirting. Give it two hours and Nikolai is bursting into Fyodor's lair lamenting how heartless he is and demanding number is unblocked. Of course none of that happens. Nikolai threatens to flood all equipment in sight. Fyodor begrudgingly gives in. Clown rejoices.

Much to Nikolai's dismay Fyodor has dozen Nokia phones so his spam goes mostly unnoticed. Much to Fyodor's dismay once Nikolai notices he's unnoticed he starts sending pigeon carriers - surely Fyodor can't ignore /that/.