it's truly an ESH situation!!! even though i usually gotta side with the lesbians 😭 it's frustrating to have no real place in f/f fandoms because everything gets sanitized. but at least i can hope that most of the purity-obsessed f/f ones are either young or needing to work through some stuff but there's very little hope for 30-something people who make fandom discourse their entire personality and just wait around for the chance to scream about how lesbians are oppressing everyone by being mean about shipping, but like in a progressive way because they're queer too, you stupid sensitive frigid hysterical lesbians, you know??