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❥ a friend asked · 4mo

do you think that a lot of what we might misconstruct as longing or yearning is plain old healthy jealousy? sbn strikes me as the kind of queer person that can't decide if he wants to be you-know-who- or wants to be IN him... but then he always talks about you-know-who in the most insane ways (my muse, my bible, he shines the brightest on stage, etc.) so I am left extremely confused haha.

LOL i love this interpretation of yeonbin (a.k.a. their e2l pipeline) but i wouldn't characterise soobin as jealous—maybe grudgingly petty & judgy? HAHAHA. in the sense that you-know-who gets ALL the attention and ALL the praise but hmph what makes him so special? he's just some guy who spends his entire life in mirrors and practice rooms. his very existence makes everyone around him feel bad for not being as clinically insane. so it's time to humble him—but soobin is repeatedly reminded of how great yeonjun is at their job (as if anyone lets him forget.....), so eventually, he settles into a stage of grudging acknowledgement. fine, maybe Mr 4th Gen It Boy does deserves his constant stream of praise. soobin will still ignore tf out of yeonjun if he can help it though, because the guy does not need more attention than he already gets. little does he know it actually drives yeonjun crazy to have the attention of millions, but not the one boy he wants.

hahaha that's clearly a more rpf-ey take on what you just shared. but if you're asking me about RL dynamics as i see it, imo soobin seems to have grown up a lot mentally. he's at peace with himself now, soooooo tbh he doesn't strike me as someone prone to jealousy—not anymore at least. imo he's more likely to feel pity for someone else who doesn't 'get it' like he does. he more clearly understands his role in the team these days & the mental clarity seems to help him avoid spiralling towards negativity. one self-help page at a time, at least. haha.

as for the way soobin describes yeonjun—i think he's just being honest about how yeonjun influences him and the group in terms of style/performance direction. those aren't necessarily romantic declarations imo, he's being very matter-of-fact. the 'muse' thing was said when he was buttering up yeonjun for a variety show so it doesn't count to me. but the other two, said in context, probably weren't exaggerations. he probably does take yeonjun as a north star. the members always say how much they learn on the job by watching yeonjun, and soobin's very much the same there imo.

LOL this answer was a brainblend of fiction and fact. the fun is somewhere in the middle. i hope some of this makes sense to you anon!

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