anon · 4d
thinking about Angelica swapping with Roland again. So many thoughts but hhnrnbngg. Roland held onto Angelica with her “this is this” motto but what does Angelica have to hold onto Roland. She’s (unintentionally) shaped him into believing in the motto/her so much that he…doesn’t have much to hold onto? Other than hamhampangpang, which you can’t really get in the library, and his mask, which is confiscated by hana. So she only has her rose tinted glasses memories of Roland.
goddd i love thinking about this. while roland is so focused on holding onto things, on keeping angelica’s motto close to his heart even if he doesn’t believe it in the same way she did, all because it’s all he properly, truly has left of her. she has their memories together, but they’re still just that: memories. Things that are, in the end, impermanent. angelica always keeps walking onwards, always continues to move on and look away from the problems of others and the pain she herself causes to make her own life easier. where, then, does she really cross over the line between “that’s that and this is this” and holding desperately onto the memories she still has?
