My gender and sexuality don't intersect so much as they are, like, a double ouroboros. They came bundled together in the form of an epiphany I had when a dear friend of mine told me she always saw me as "a very gay boy." I'd been wrestling with my gender and sexuality for a long time before this, being primarily attracted to men but not liking being partnered with them (due to being aggressively "woman"-ed).

I'd tried to be a lesbian, but had trouble connecting with women romantically (and the one time I did manage to have a real relationship with a girl, she had this tendency to... I don't know, speak very fondly of these perceived binary differences between me and our mutual boyfriend, which she rooted in our supposed genders... it's hard to explain without unpacking more than I want to, but suffice to say, it was fucking awful). I was also just... really into guys. When I realized that being both a man, and being attracted to men, was a possibility for me, it was like my soul sighed in relief.

So I think, for me, my gender and my orientation are one and the same. I remember when I first told my partner that I felt more like a boy than not, he said that it wasnt surprising to him, because most/all of the people and characters I'd talked about relating to or feeling represented by up to that point had been very queer, often chaotic, gender-bending / feminine men. And damn, he was totally right. These two identities being intertwined, for me, has given me the freedom to accept them both individually, and has helped a lot of experiences I've had throughout my life click into place.