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Do you hate being told what to do?
Probably yeah. When it's about something that I like doing and don't need help with, I certainly don't need nor want anyone to tell me what to do. When it's for something that I really struggle with, like cooking or cleaning, I would like for someone to help me, but that's less about being ordered to do something and more about being taught how to do something and getting some compassion when I struggle.
When I lived with my parents, they would order me to do some chores, and they would always invalidate everything I do. They would tell me I am doing it wrong without telling me how to do it "right" (right for them). They would not let me do things a certain way that's simpler for me even thought it did not change the outcome at all. If I did something spontaneously without them asking, instead of thanking me or encouraging me or saying anything positive, they would say either that I am not doing enough or that I am doing it wrong. I ended up retreating into a shell, hiding my emotions completely, acting like a robot and talking as little as possible to try to get them to speak less often so they would hurt me less.
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