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⭐ serious weakness faq
https://xrafstar.monster/blog/serious-weakness-aftermath
⭐ selected letters + archive will be placed here
https://xrafstar.monster/codex/me/letters
512
I leave an offering at your altar o haruspex. Once I got so into a video game that I hardly walked at all for two weeks. As it turns out, you need to walk around for your digestive system to function properly. Consequently, two weeks of greasy shitty gamer food impacted hard into my rectum like a concrete apple. I spent hours trying to pass it and fissured my anus from the strain. At this point the advice is to go to the hospital so that the nurses can help you birth the thing. Instead, I got a butter knife and stuck it in there to start prying bits off. (Not medical advice.) Thankfully this worked and I eventually it slid out in big chunks like apple slices. This happened at my mom's house and nobody ever found out, thank all that is holy. I am however still haunted by the UTI I caught from doing this in a half-full tub, thinking that this would help soften the stool. What do you read in my entrails?
P.S. Tub was cleaned and knife destroyed.
silence as the haruspices calculate their scores 👁️🗨️🗡️
-reminds me of Shintaro Kago’s comic When All’s Said and Done.
-i like the water birth method.
-big chunks like apple slices!! 🤩
-the apple motif...possible golden apple symbolism?
-UTI!!
-i wonder what game it was…
in conclusion: great details, good setpiece, Kagoesque horror and rising tension of knife near anus, and the sequela keeps it coming, really ties it into the broader "having a body" universe. thank you for this incredible masterpiece! entrails = ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐!!!
happy to report that in the interest of promoting torture literacy i have requested seriweak be added to my local library's catalogue ::]
i wanted to thank you for writing the way you do and about the things you do because it made me realize there’s really no rules when it comes to creative work and i can type in run-on sentences like i’m trying to puke all the words out in a single breath because that’s actually super sick and it’s how my stupid brain works anyways and if we’re honest it makes text so much more interesting to read. i was actually able to finish something short and dirty and sweet that’d been knocking around my brain for months-years because of this so thank you very much from the bugs in my brain to yours. 🪱🖤✨
Does Perfect's suit "do" anything? I assume it's a kind of armor of some sort or form. I remember clicking "The suit sanitizes the action" in MT because I was curious if it -literally- sanitized things or not lol
Symbolically sanitizes. He has a strong OCD attachment to the suit. The suit itself has the following properties:
⭐ Air-tripping texture, elastomeric fit.
⭐ Antimicrobial fibers treated with silver ions (so some sanitary qualities, but nothing that could be regarded as sterilization).
⭐ Hydrophobic, hyperwicking.
His suit protects against insect bites, but the defensive power is mostly mitigation; dampening a punch or slowing a stab. Flexibility is more important than armor, since graceful movements increase power.
Some skinsuits have morgellon weave, but any dormant properties of his suit are unknown at this time… 👁️🗨️
the true legend of tails prower made me cry, she deserved so much better and she almost got there but didnt... i wish she gets to run off with rouge and be happy. and amy rose too!!
do you ever imagine crossover events for your characters if they come from delineated stories? like how might trianon interact with rubicon or cancer, etc
sometimes! rubicon and cancer the most probably, because rubicon could get a horrible flesh-eating disease and need to be taken care of. i also like the idea of osamu tezuka's star system heheh. but a lot of the time the characters are made for their souls to burn perfectly into each other...
just wanted to let you know i use a peeled off miralax drug facts label as my bookmark for your works <3
“whiplash ballet medfet” is all my dreams coming true at once. cant believe you’ve done this. ALSO i think… and have thought for a long time… that trianon and nina from black swan would be friends. they have retard angel twin dna and they are both fantasy autistic torture victims who metabolise all evil to fuel their own transformations. gay stuntmen rolling through life changing injuries. cockroach girls! nina’s world is way more bleak imo. she need friendship or the honest/direct violence she fantasises about... or both! this may very well mean nothing to you i just got excited when i saw ballet talk. thanks in advance for all the fucking incredible shit you’re planning!!!!!
https://youtu.be/Jf126Z_hy7I I made a review of Torture Works (it’s very positive, don’t worry, just thought maybe you’d like to see)
this is so cute what the fuck...
thank you for loving Cancer!! i got so much emotional…he is precious! i want him to succeed!! but first he’s gonna suffer a lot…
yes, the fecal matter is essential! relying purely on blood/gore can be such a half-hearted way of writing about disgust. blood is inherently ennobling; win or lose, victory or sacrifice. but i’m more interested in failure. the fecal martyrs…the abdominal angels…
for Maximum Softness as an “allegory for x”, i don’t personally have the experience of wanting to be a woman or being trans, but i understand how people can appreciate it that way. the autistic reading is equally valid, and ultimately it’s about the weaponization of all things. of course someone androgynous like me will be swept into the same mass grave as everyone else, and all amorphous beings must stick together…
thank you for the very thoughtful, encouraging, and passionate review, it makes me so happy! <333
if one were to draw tria fanart…. how would one submit it to you…
heya, um.. this is kind of stupid and random, but im in a google doc named 'schronheit'.. theres like hundreds of pages with a bunch of people typing up their thoughts and i have vague memories of writing on it as a kid... i suddenly stumbled upon it and am desperately trying to find where it came from and how i even found it when i was younger - for some reason it lead me the game 'zeitgeist' and then to here. answers probably no, but, do you know anything about it?
it's from my game Foldscape. i made it 10 years ago, and it linked to a blank google doc. i haven't touched it since.
looking at it now. it's emotional seeing people's messages from all over the world. lonely late nights...some almost half my age, or near the age i was when i made it. really special ;;;;
cute that nothingness could become a digital nurse log, the Devils Hole pupfish of the internet. i am glad connection could be made. <333
Cancer Prize contribution: I have turned things around for myself gastrically but one wildcard is that I have bad period shits that sometimes tear my anus and cause confusion/fusion between my cunt blood and blood from my glass bones paper skin ass. However, Cancer truly speaks to me in his precarious mix of household experiences! I spent the back half of my childhood in an outwardly normal middle class home but with torture and neglect, and I had off and on hygiene problems (side note: the dad in Your Mother Has Fallen Out of Love is my dad, never seen or felt that psychology so strongly in a story, thank you from the bottom of my heart). So I would go to my good school in my nice school uniform reeking of bacterial vaginosis, trying to keep my legs closed all day, skipping lessons and not doing anything just hiding in the toilet because it was safe and private.
It was also mandatory for students to write with cartridge-loaded fountain pens unless they had an extenuating circumstance. I wanted to do everything the real children were doing so I tried it but I am an inveterate autistic chewer and kept biting through the end of the pen/cartridge and it would explode in my mouth and one time I swallowed a lot of ink and had to go throw up and later had vivid blue diarrhoea, and while I was at the mirror trying to scrub the ink out of my mouth some older girls came in and they regarded me coolly and laughed at me behind their hands. Please enjoy the HOT SHAME of this memory
thank you for the HOT SHAME i adore this, was completely entranced. i was a huge toilet hider too. leash is very much an eidolon of my childhoods. congrats on your gastric comeback!
i also tore my anus!! i hope the cancer cuntboy endometriosis period shits adventure will bring some catharsis 😋 and there may be a spiritual sequel to YMHFOoLWY cooking…
vagi-gnosis…ink shits…cool regard! you tell it so well, these really are the soul of leash! i will add to the leash letters section unless otherwise desired. thank you so much 🙏💜
i really like how rubicon is just allowed to be presented as unambiguously sexy and desirable to many within the specific context of his story. it doesnt justify anything he does (though ofc you've long since moved on from petty and simplistic morality fables), it's just there. i dont know that ive ever seen any other story that is explicitly about "this wheelchair-bound crossdressing castrated burn victim is the sexiest creature alive," because people who do find that attractive are considered perverts (see: the fan response to people wanting to fuck curly from mouthwashing in his post-burn body), and really i think that's somehow crueler than just simply acknowledging him as a being with sexual desires in his own right. im glad that he sucks, and im glad that he's sexy. may he make everything explode forever
"this wheelchair-bound crossdressing castrated burn victim is the sexiest creature alive" YES HE IS <333
the greatest sign of respect (to me) is desire. these protoplasmic fucks see crippled/deformed bodies as inherently perverse and unworthy of love, so who else would want to fuck them but a pervert? call me #1 cripplefucker I don't care!!
"im glad that he sucks, and im glad that he's sexy." thanks for getting it, your letter encapsulates it all so beautifully <3 rubisplosions forever!
not a cancer prize experience, but a riparian one!!! i remember distinctly that around the time you released light concentrations, i threw up chocolate after getting nic sick from a particularly strong cigarette. it was a little bit pink... very strange. it stands as an important experience to me!
in response to a question about muscles you said "the primary modality of physical cultivation in my universe is through dance" and that + the rest of it is driving me crazy. i am a former ballet dancer and i think ballet is more like something that you would make up to torture twinks than something real. i did other kinds of dance after but most of them were kind of the same, just desperately throwing my body into pleasing shapes, pain, failing and never stopping. ballet was the cruelest though. its espoused values of purity and gentleness can tell you how fucked up and evil it is. it eats toddlers. have you ever seen a foot stretcher? i used one. i danced en pointe really badly and theres nothing sadder and more pathetic than that. i still miss it. if you dont cut ur toenails super short your pointe shoes will push them back and make them turn purpleblack and fall off. i could go on about this for hours. i would love to know your thoughts. kisses
oh my god THANK YOU. yes ballet is so beautiful and evil. I should put Cancer in a foot stretcher. I will post various things this year about the xrafstarverse and dance but basically "cool physical movements" and dancing are how disease powers are unleashed. so Cancer's handler subjects him to "whiplash meets ballet meets medfet" regimens to maximize his fever overdrive potential. I love to dance and do it every day. it is how I understand my environment and navigate spatially. I want to spread music and dance through what I make...
If I make a game, it must be very physical and dancerly. I made it so Cancer can grind on rails and spin around. even within the confines of rpgmaker, I want to at least use animations and extensive hand fetishism to convey my dream. but it's on the backburner while I take care of existing projects.
the OA, and Nahobino from SMT V are also my idol in this regard. I live for the veneration of the skintight boy dancing for his life. if you have any gruesome info for me, please share or DM in some way so I can incorporate it into the story. Thank you dancer! <3
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