I'm thinking of A Serbian Film right now, for some reason.

Would I get paid more depending on the hardness of the kick? I think I could get a bit more whilst not hurting the baby too much.

Ok, yes, under certain conditions I could agree to that. Like if the kick is gentle and the baby gets a cut. And I'd sign in my blood that, once the baby is old enough to roadhouse kick me (provided I'm still alive), they can get to it (and still keep their cut).

Pounds, maybe. Dollars, no.

Like as hard as I can? Nooooo.

No but I’d probably kick the parents

I'd punt that toddler so far, you'd think a stork flew by and delivered it.. Jk no I wouldn't.

My baby will be very angry if I did that to her. Since she is a bit taller she might as a result slap me and spank my ass. Sure I could convince her we share that sum if I refrain from kicking her too hard?

Only if I could kick it lightly.

..... I won't hurt him.. I got bills😄

Really really lightly, in the toe

NEVER.

i'll kick a baby for some american deli hot wings

That's absurd

Cash up front? And like how many people would know....nah I couldn't live with myself